Under the Sea School Play

 Went to Thomas' first 4th grade  school musical tonite..Under the Sea.. with the kids dressed up as different kids of fish.. "King" fish, "Tiger sharks, "Clown"fish, and a puffer fish all decked out in blow up latex gloves! Thomas was a shark .Was so fun to watch him do his lines so perfectly, he was just awesome! SO proud of him and looked like he had a ball doing it! My Little actor! Bravo!!

What a week!

Well this week was surely a doozy. Palm Sunday,{ my birthday} started out innocently enough.. it was a warm sunny day, nice breeze, perfect birthday day. Tom sent me out shopping for my birthday. Ok . He wanted to make me a cake with the kids- how sweet! ;) That kinda went sour, he's a guy, he doesn't bake, that's ok, I picked one up on the way home- he just decorated it. He ordered Pizza Hut- { way to annihilated my diet- but at this point I was in the mood anyway..} we ate, I gained, watched Home Makeover, went to bed. It was nice- I spent it with the family. 39- how did it creep up so fast? Anyway, Monday rolled around, and so did the germs.. brought Thomas to Karate camp for Spring Break Camp & picked him up later puking his brains out until later that night and pooping out the other end where we had to keep changing sheets.. I slept in his room to make sure he was alright- Somewhere he picked up a nasty stomach virus. Tuesday he was much better, but it was my turn.. I went to the Dr to be weighed in-at 120 - not bad,Deb called to wish me Happy Birthday, by 10:30, it was my turn for the virus-from then till 4:30 am, I was glued to the toilet with a bucket in my lap and camped on the bathroom floor for the night! What the hell? I inevitibly lost 8 pounds in one night- there must be a record for that! I awoke to 113 pounds as to the 120 I was weighed in at the day before! Wednesday and Thursday I was just weak and lightheaded and lethargic & focused on rehydrating myself while it was BRENDANS turn! Not so much throwing up - { just for half a day} but had the diarreah- OY! will it not stop? So we all were drowning in Gatorade around here! Tom somehow escaped it the lucky dog! But has problems of his own coughing and hacking everywhere [ I think bronchitis but wont get looked at & is driving me insane the grossness of how he sounds!} Anyway, I am now a size 3- not the way I wanted to lose my last few pounds but I'll take em! Now Thomas still can't lick this virus- feels tired, and fevery, and doesn't want to do anything and went to scouts and was falling asleep on me, and now sent him to school and came back home with a 101 fever.. new week where are you?? Lets hope the soup I gave him does the trick! :)

The Mom Song

The Mom Song Sung to William Tell Overture with Lyrics - The most amazing videos are a click away
There are times where I can SOO relate to this song! Enjoy ALL!
Get up now
Get up now
Get up out of bed
Wash your face
Brush your teeth
Comb your sleepyhead
Here's your clothes and your shoes
Hear the words I said
Get up now! Get up and make your bed
Are you hot? Are you cold?
Are you wearing that?
Where's your books and your lunch and your homework at?
Grab your coat and gloves and your scarf and hat
Don't forget! You gotta feed the cat
Eat your breakfast, the experts tell us it's the most important meal of all
Take your vitamins so you will grow up one day to be big and tall
Please remember the orthodontist will be seeing you at 3 today
Don't forget your piano lesson is this afternoon so you must play
Don't shovel
Chew slowly
But hurry
The bus is here
Be careful
Come back here
Did you wash behind your ears?
Play outside, don't play rough, will you just play fair?
Be polite, make a friend, don't forget to share
Work it out, wait your turn, never take a dare
Get along! Don't make me come down there
Clean your room, fold your clothes, put your stuff away
Make your bed, do it now, do we have all day?
Were you born in a barn? Would you like some hay?
Can you even hear a word I say?
Answer the phone! Get off the phone!
Don't sit so close, turn it down, no texting at the table
No more computer time tonight!
Your iPod's my iPod if you don't listen up
Where are you going and with whom and what time do you think you're coming home?
Saying thank you, please, excuse me makes you welcome everywhere you roam
You'll appreciate my wisdom someday when you're older and you're grown
Can't wait till you have a couple little children of your own
You'll thank me for the counsel I gave you so willingly
But right now I thank you not to roll your eyes at me
Close your mouth when you chew, would appreciate
Take a bite maybe two of the stuff you hate
Use your fork, do not burp or I'll set you straight
Eat the food I put upon your plate
Get an A, get the door, don't get smart with me
Get a grip, get in here, I'll count to three
Get a job, get a life, get a PHD
Get a dose of,
"I don't care who started it!
You're grounded until you're 36"
Get your story straight and tell the truth for once, for heaven's sake
And if all your friends jumped off a cliff would you jump, too?
If I've said it once, I've said at least a thousand times before
That you're too old to act this way
It must be your father's DNA
Look at me when I am talking
Stand up straighter when you walk
A place for everything and everything must be in place
Stop crying or I'll give you something real to cry about
Oh!
Brush your teeth, wash your face, put your PJs on
Get in bed, get a hug, say a prayer with mom
Don't forget, I love you
And tomorrow we will do this all again because a mom's work never ends
You don't need the reason why
Because, because, because, because
I said so, I said so, I said so, I said so
I'm the mom, the mom, the mom, the mom, the mom!!
Ta da!!!

It's That Time Of Year Again!!!

Last night I attended our school's PTO meeting to discuss what will be happening with the holidays. Well, it's that time of year again! Gingerbread shop, Supper with Santa, and Chik- Fil- A night. The Ginger Bread shop for those of you who don't know is an opportunity for the students to do holiday shopping for their families assisted by volunteers like myself. their gifts are then wrapped and sent home for holiday giving. The children learn how to budget money to buy for everyone on their lists and experience the thrill of giving their carefully selected gifts to family , friends teachers,coaches, pets,etc. - the gifts are priced anywhere from 1.00 to 10.00. some items are handmade, some are donated, all are new and unwrapped. The kids look forward to The Gingerbread Shop all year. Anything from coffee mugs to bath sets to pet toys to baby toys to key chains-you name it- there's something for everyone we've never had a bad complaint and this year there will be many practical items such as tools ,candles, mugs picture frames,etc.and immediately following the Gingerbread shop is the infamous
Supper with SANTA!! On Thursday, December 4th, Santa will be visiting Braden River to have dinner with the students and their families and pose for a picture or two!The PTO will host the event which will include fine dining from Carrabba's Italian Grill and the kids will get to have a personal conversation with Santa himself and pose for a picture from photographer Margaret Lanier of Lanier photography, go on a train ride in the car pickup area, and even play in the snow! yes SNOW! In Florida!! This year, we will be importing REAL SNOW for the kids to play in - not the diaper filling we had last year that they sloshed around in that just got too gelly and messy- some thought it was applesauce, some thought it was ice and another component, - we only knew we weren't allowed to throw it in case of injury-?? Well this year we were promised the REAL thing! WHOO HOO! and on January 12, Is another round of Chick - Fil- A night where the kids and their families can go to Chik- Fil- A from 5- 8 and buy anything they want, and 20 % of the profits go right back to the school so they can buy cool stuff like computers, books, whiteboards, smartboards, or any other thing they might need- heck all the kids care about is the yummy food and the cool play area they have-who are THEY kidding??!! So lets get ready for another year of some awesome memories! I hate to boast but, My kid goes to a pretty cool school! That's my update for now, Until next time, Have a great Turkey Day!

Here We Go Again.

So the time has come where it looks like Tom and I might be finally heading down that forbidden road once and for all. This past year things just have not been going well for us at all. I really don't know what his problem is. He says it's me. But when we try to talk it out, we just end up in a fight, and I end up in tears. He doesn't know how to talk things like two mature adults. Everything is either, " fine, fuck you' I don't want to talk about it" you just don't get it" I'm tired of going through this" . You do this every time" or the all mature silent treatment that last for a week on end that I am enduring right now. did I mention I don't even know what he is pissed off at me about and won't tell me? He just says " I'm done" And I am not permitted to speak to him or I catch a ration of shit judging from the tone of his voice if I do. So if I really HAVE to talk to him, it better be good! All I can think of is I keep the house clean, clothes clean, dishes clean, family fed, drive the kids to school, pick them up, drive them to church,{ which is another topic in itself- if you don't believe in God,fine. That's your choice-I'm not one to preach to you, but don't mock me and my belief and my decision to bring my boys up in the Catholic faith just because you don't believe or have trouble believing. That just irks me to no end and is completely not fair to me and is disrespectful to me and your children. I also take them to Boy scouts,religion classes, soccer practice, games,volunteer at the school, help with homework, take out the garbage, make sure recycling is taken care of, tidy up around the house, do diaper duty/ potty training, sometimes I WILL forget to water the plants I'm only human but if they catch my eye I will tend to them, In the midst of my running around,maybe he could help out a little bit, maybe that would take the strain off of things, he DOES tend to ask if he could help when I'm all DONE with everything- you're a bit late- but I swear he does it on purpose just so that he can say he offered! And a I have yet to hear a "Thank you for things which really gets me... I have yet to feel really appreciated.. More of "it's what's expected of me" is what I was even told a few times if I recall correctly which if I had a cast iron frying pan.... The gall! where his job is make the money and come home and sit on his ass and watch the news? ummm? Yes you make the money, and I stay home with the kids, if we could afford to put Brendan in daycare, I would, until then, don't hold it against me. You pay for everything, and I am very grateful for that, but don't hold it over our heads- like at Christmas time- he wants a pricy item I cant afford and when I tell him I can't he says "then I don't want it then" like a child. It's not fair. I want to buy it for him , but can't . Can't buy much at 125.00 every 2 weeks plus putting gas in the car. Can't save with that. Have to get a shirt or wallet or something low ticket like everyone else. The other thing that burns me is yes we have credit cards, but try not to use them, but when we DO use them , he makes it KNOWN that his present was paid for with his own money so basically he bought his own present in essence- Dont do that- for 1 it makes us "little people" feel stupid and not everyone makes as much money as him, and 2- it spoils the meaning of Christmas- Christmas is about the thought the spirit, the meaning ,not the priciest present .Half his family can't buy presents anymore due to economic problems. which is fine so I tell them to just come for Christmas dinner and call it even.He's been known to say to them "where's my present? and they say they can't afford one. His moms out of work, his sisters a waitress, and well his brother's just cheap..;) As for the "cave man" state of mind, We're not in the 50's anymorrrree.. Sorry.. This is the year 2008- Youre not Archie Bunker, And I'm Not Edith.. I know that's how it went with YOUR mom & Dad when YOU were growing up, but flash forward, new generation! Also, If I forget to shower that day, I promise I will the next day! So back off! This is all done on a daily/weekly basis- when its done , we do it all over again, Maybe he's feeling a bit neglected? Well you know what? I take care of "that" too-I may be a bit in dire need of some lessons, but hey at least I'll make an effort! But I can't even remember the last time I was "taken care of" so that's been a bit lax as well. So maybe he's a bit pissed. Hell I should be pissed, but I'm not, because it's not that high on my list -keeping my family taken care of is. But I've grown up learning you gotta "give in order to receive" so... for now hes not on speaking terms with me and I've been camping on the couch. Which brings me to another point. Why do I always have to leave the bed? Anytime hes the littlest mad at me, he says " go sleep on the couch"? I sleep on my left side , and he rolls onto his right side, he says " roll over" he thinks I'm staring at him! you paranoid freak! go to sleep! so for the rest of my life, I can ONLY sleep on my RIGHT side or my back? and if I sleep on the couch hes pissed at me? yeah THIS is gonna work the next 50 years! No WONDER there's nothin goin on in the bedroom! I can't even remember the last time he kissed me passionately or even held my hand! how sad is that?? And romance? don't go there. I can count on one hand in 8 years the amount of times he gave me flowers.His main deal with me is that I put 'weight on" {I'm 125 pounds}boy please! If you wanted a trophy wife/ super model to flaunt to your friends or co -workers, you came to the wrong place- first off, I am Miss Shy to begin with, except if you get me liquored up, them we'll talk, other than that, I clam up. You are talkin to the wrong girl. Why can't you just like/ love me for who I am? I got soft in my middle where I had fat sucked out to make my stomach flat [Meanwhile he's got a good belly there] and my butt isn't as flat as it once was- and my thighs could use some work - that general area needs to lose some inches I agree, but I have a LIFE going on that evolves around a two year old that doesn't always like taking a nap, I need to clean the house in the morning, I run errands, I don't just sit on my ASS and eat Bon BON's all day! I barely get to sit down never mind workout! I'll be damned if I even know where my walk man even IS! If he hooked up a cam he'd see me going zoom! zoom! picking up toys, vacuuming, potty training, you name it, yes I will check my email, them its back to business. i am more or less "super mom" as he calls me. There's definite reason why I cry myself to sleep every other night. I cry in front of the kids and they wonder why mommy is so sad. I try not to and put on a brave face, but I just look at them and think of the future, and the tears just start streaming down my face. I wanna leave, But I don't have the money. He pays me 125 dollars every 2 weeks.I can't save with that. I know he can't help it, he'd'd like to give more, that's all we can budget I can barely pay for gas and stuff with that. That's all he can afford. The kids love their dad. but they're also afraid of him a bit. He's stern but can be playful, they just want his attention, to play with him. But he even said to me " I hate kids. " He said to me before Thomas was even born when he saw the picture of twins on the wall "we don't want that" and when I was pregnant with twins Thomas and Nicholas I to this day CANNOT find in the medical records it stating that Nicholas had only 3 chambers in his heart-maybe I can't read it right, I'm going to have it looked at by a professional, but I really don't want to have to think that Tom did something so despicable as to have a selective reduction done so that he would not have to support another child even though Nicholas had Down Syndrome- So what? Tons of children are born with Down syndrome and lead perfectly normal lives. You don't abort it because it's not born "normal" to your standards. We had many fights while I was pregnant because I was against the procedure, he was for it, right up until the day of it, and I remember him saying, "if we keep this baby I guarantee our marriage will not last!" and I was so vulnerable, and I needed him and I loved him, where I just folded and agreed. I wished I was stronger and just held my guns and Thomas still had his twin brother.Because he talks about him all the time now where I know he really wishes he had his twin brother and it breaks my heart and I hate myself for the decision I wish I never made. All because of a man who basically in a way controls me and I somehow have to break free of that and become my own person. A stronger person for me and my boys. Otherwise we're just a second generation of what he was growing up with with HIS mother and father and I'll be DAMNED if I let my family become the product of a broken family like his was growing up when his father was leading the controlling ways talking down to his wife and kids the way he did and left them and basically the kids became degenerates. The mother busted her ass to provide for them and he put her down and the kids any chance he got, - thought he was God's gift. Thought children should be seen and not heard. Had the temper of a bull.In any case, I will NOT let my kids follow suit of a first generation full circle follow through of what his childhood was like. I heard the stories and they won't happen.I read that some men follow the parenting paths of their parents which is understandable- that's how they were taught- that's all they know- His father is a horrible role model,let's leave it at that. If this is the beginning of the end, I need to find a good paying job to support myself, my kids, bank some money, so that when the time comes to move on, I will be ready to say goodbye. But we're in such an economic crisis, who's hiring these days? That's the kicker. And without a degree? I'm double screwed.. I REALLY like photography, but I don't know what kind of future and benefits it holds..that and animals..Tom, why'd ya gotta go and do this? Can't you be a LITTLE more mature when it comes to things? like your marriage?You have two boys who adore you and are going to be very screwed up about this whole thing. Don't do this to them.Or us. All I ever prayed for was a happy healthy family and someone to share it with. Did I REALLY have to say someone who would love me as much as I love them? I thought that fell along the lines of a happy family.. Today Friday- he seems to be talking normally to me, but he still has a sharp tone to it, so I'm still on my guard- This happens at least once a month so its not blown over.. theres a festival this weekend involving ribs , and trick or treating next week for the kids - he wont go to that one, but the kids will get dressed up which will lighten him up a bit, Halloween usually lightens him up, but the holidays stress him out a bit, I'll be on guard. I miss you guys. Sorry this was so long.

Brendan's Big Boy Bed

Brendan finally reached the milestone of owning his own big boy bed. he's been taking naps in Thomas' bed when Thomas is in school, and very much outgrowing his crib. At night when it is time for him to go to sleep, He even says "I want big boy bed". So last week I ordered him a toffee colored Bed, headboard, and dresser for 500 buck- and yesterday went to Sam's and picked up the mattress for 20 bucks. He spend his first night in his new bed, and it was a success! no getting up in the middle of the night, in fact, he crawled in on his own when it was time for bed and in the covers and went right to bed. He even didn't want to get out of bed this morning! I stayed on the couch to keep an ear out, and he called out a little bit last night, but it was only because he couldn't find his puppy! i put it next to him on his pillow, and he went right back to sleep. Brendan's big boy bed I can safely say was a success and a hit!

Grandparents Day

Today Thomas had Grandparents Day at his Elementary school. The students got to invite their Grandparents to lunch and had special tables decorated for them, and had a special hot lunch menu and tell them about their day and what goes on in their day as an average Elementary student at their school. My mother in Law was unsure how to get to Thomas' school, so I drove her, and the three of us had a nice lunch together. At first Thomas was like "where's Brendan?" I said " well You're here to spend time with Grandma, Brendan can have lunch with you anytime- today is you and Grandma's special time, I just drove her here, so ignore me and tell Grandma about your day today and what goes on here with your classes". He focused alot on me, but finally got the hang of things and talked and hung out with her- I kinda felt bad he didn't do it to begin with, but he's only 7, He doesn't think things through sometimes, and when it was time to go to recess, he thanked her for coming and gave her a big hug, before running off with his friend and out the door.. But it was nice . I'm glad we went and he always loves it when I go have lunch with him. I think he was just out of sync with the whole "bring your Grandparent to lunch for Grandparent's Day thing- *rolleyes he'll grow up one of these days... maybe next week...LOL

Humane Hubby's New Friends

Recently Tom has taken a shine to some of the neighborhood dogs that have been romping around unattended in our area. This has me concerned, but yet not so concerned. It's nice to see him take on a bit of a hobby and stress reliever, when his day gets a bit hectic, and he can turn to these dogs that have been coming around and make his day go away; even if it is for just a moment to pet them or feed them or whatever he does when they come around,- they seem harmless enough. It looks like someone kicked them out of their home, or moved away and just abandoned them or left them behind- {the jackasses}because Tom once tried to follow then home once and they { there's two - a black poodle and a Jack Russle who looks like a beagle} ducked into a backyard. But they seem to come back around every couple of days looking haggard as ever and more starving than the last time we saw them. There's another one now that looks like a black whippet-who also looks starved to hell- {almost greyhound skinny} It's beginning to piss me off that someone could do this to their pets - if its all one owner I'll be REALLY mad! If that person passed on, then it would be different.... Anyway, Tom has tried to catch the Jack Russell, but it won't let you anywhere near its collar- abuse? The black one runs away if you try and approach it- VERY skittish! He tosses our leftovers to them to feed them - hence why they keep coming back- Hey at least they're eating the poor things! But my steak and Turkey roll and chicken leftovers? I kinda WANTED them! Call me selfish! Money's kinda hard to come by these days and they're going to feeding strays that aren't letting you go near them to catch them to give them a home! I tried calling animal control, but they have crappy hours- never open! Then witnessed the oddest thing yesterday- the black one is apparently a boy as it had sex with the Jack Russell on a neighbors lawn and got STUCK ass to ass for 10 minutes!we tried luring it away with fod, but it was dragging the poodle behind her still stuck to her , then learned he was in mating stage and had to go " down " in order to become "undone" and that it was common for dogs to get stuck ass to ass like that! Okay! learn something new everyday! So Tom enjoys feeding strays, but hardly fed our dog when we had her- go figure! He did at times- I shouldn't say that. I don't know if its a safe practice . And he said he didn't want another dog after Brandy- now he's trying to catch a stray? I'll never figure him out! I'll just keep searching for my Pappillion...;) white named MiMi- thats my next dog I want- I decided- mama wants a new dog. LOL When that;ll happen I don't know , But I do! for now, i thought It was cute seeing the softer side of Tom and his new little hobby feeding the neighborhood stragglers. Couldn't he just get an RC car or something or be a craftsman of sorts?

Back to School

Today's the day my little man went back to school. Second grade. Gettin up there! I was all teary eyed when it came to preschool, but he's moving up into the big leagues where they actually take books home now! When we went for Open house, he whispered to me " Mom,what are those? I said those are text books hon" He goes textbooks? I'm gonna have textbooks? " I said "yup! and probably, most definitly, you'll have homework in them too, every night, so kiss your X Box good bye" ! He said " I thought you said Second grade was gonna be easy!"I said " I did , It all depends on how you look at it. - If you do your work on time, and not be lazy, it will, If you don't , and wanna be a slacker, it'll be hell. -From me and your teacher!" He just went "ARRGH!" Anyway, we started the morning off good, on time, up early, full of energy, so that's a plus! Brendan on the other hand was sad to see his sidekick go! He wanted to be in the picture, with his little Diego backpack.. { that has his essentials inside- {toys, sippy cups, snacks, potty seat and pull ups, } While Thomas took his Off to school picture. When we dropped Thomas off at his classroom, Brendan's heart sank when he couldn't go in! He cried "open da door! open da door!" I pried him away and explained Thomas has to go to school now, we can't go in... we'll pick him up later after lunch.. " he was too upset to understand. The poor thing. But I said a couple magic words to cheer him up- "how about the park?" He mumbled "park" So we went to the Boo- Hoo breakfast the school has every year on the first day of school where they have coffee and juice and bagels and coffee cake, and all sorts of yummy breakfast treats and all the moms and dads get to say hello to new and old friends and comfort each other or catch up on each other,or look forward to another year.. it's a nice gesture- food kicks butt too! ;) Brendan ran around with a couple little boys his age while I met up with some new moms and some I recognized from last year. Like I said - fun - then we went off to the park per his reminding me and my promise. We played for about an hour until me and my jeans wearin self started to roast- { the cafeteria is usually freezing for those of you wondering WHY I was wearing jeans at the end of August in Florida!} I was planning on getting a quick bite to eat then home, but Brendan getting so upset didnt come into plan, so I didn't accomodate the outside weather... Then it was off to home for a snack and out of the heat and a nap for my littlest of little men. My how they grow so quickly. If only there was a slow button on them. Why do they have to grow up in such a hurry? If only they knew what was in store for them! They wouldn't be in such a hurry!

3 Years Smoke Free!

Today marks the 3 year anniversary where A- I learned a week after our 5th anniversary where we went on a cool gambling cruise {and unfortunately I had a few to drink!- How was I to know?!} That we were going to be expecting our second little spitfire Brendan Michael March 21st, 2006! Now that's what I would call a hell of a belated Anniversary present No??! Was I surprised? Hell yeah! Excited? Triple hell yeah! Tom stunned? shocked? taken aback? all those things guys feel when they're told they're going to be a dad whether the first or tenth time? Hell yeah! When I found out, I was back on the wagon smoking again at the time. When I first found out I was pregnant with Thomas, I threw the pack away but snuck a few for a couple weeks, but this time I said , I'm going cold turkey and not looking back. I had been meaning to quit anyway, and this was my perfect opportunity!SO B- It is also the 3 year anniversary where I am smoke free! Yes! On August 15th, 2005, the day I found out I was INDEED 3 months pregnant with Brendan, I literally threw my pack of Marlboro lights out the window, and never looked back! I'm so much better without them too! I can taste things better,when I excercise say on the treadmill or do cardio,I don't get out of breath and can go longer durations, I have a keener sense of smell, my clothes don't smell like smoke, my breath doesn't smell like an ashtray, and I probably put 10 years back on my life or more! And the best part is I'll be around later in life for my kids to see them grow up and be a part of their lives when they get older. Who'd a thought a little piece of paper with shredded leaves in it could do so much damage ? Had I really known then when I was 15, I probably never woulda picked one up, but funny what peer pressure does to ya! I got hooked for the next 20 years! I'd say I was due to quit , and what a nice round number to quit at too!Now if only I can get Tom to stop too, Our family would be all set with all the pesky second hand smoke, but that's an ugly battle in itself.. He's trying- he's got the patch on as we speak - all we can do is pray and send vibes and hope it lasts forever! God Willing! I won my battle- His Journey's Just begun....